It's my blog, so I'm going to vent a little...
I have to admit, this has me completely out of whack. I wouldn't say my coworker and I are friends, friendly acquaintances for sure but not much beyond that. We do the same job but he works from home so our paths don't cross very often. I believe he is younger than me and I assume his wife was as well. I also know they had small children.
Tragedy.
She had been battling an illness for a long time and finally lost the fight. I don't know the details, but it really doesn't matter. When I heard the news from my boss I almost cried. I've had this consuming sadness all day long. I was at a rehearsal this evening and couldn't really concentrate on what I was supposed to be doing.
I never met her.
When an elderly person gets sick and dies it is very sad, but I don't think too many people would go so far as labeling it a tragedy or saying 'it's unfair.' This is completely different. In these situations my thoughts are mainly on those left behind.
An incomplete family.
I have no idea what I'll say to him the next time we meet. I want to be sympathetic, but I truly have no idea what he's been through or what he's dealing with now. I can't even imagine. Actually, over the last 13 hours or so that is what I've been doing, trying to imagine how I would handle the same situation.
Faith
I would like to think I would lean on my faith, and God would help me through it. Since I am a broken and sinful man I would more likely scream at God begging for an explanation and demand that He fix this problem so life can go on just as I expect it to. How stupid is that? I don't think I could be Job, but I might be able to find a mustard seed.
Yin and Yang
I have to admit, the thought of going through my life without my wife scares the hell out of me. She means the world to me, and if I can claim even a little bit that I am a good man, husband, and/or father it's because of her. There are WAAAYYYYY to many sappy movie lines that describe what she means to me such as "You complete me" etc., but the one that fits the best is an exchange between Rocky and Paulie in the original Rocky
Paulie What's the story? What's happenin'? Ya really like her?
Rocky Balboa Sure, I like her.
Paulie I don't see it. What's the attraction?
Rocky Balboa I don't know. Fills gaps, I guess.
Paulie What's 'gaps'?
Rocky Balboa I dunno, gaps. She's got gaps, I got gaps. Together, we fill gaps. I dunno.
I fear that if something were to ever happen to my wife I would end up like some crazy guy stumbling around downtown mumbling to myself. I actually have a lot of faith that God has built a lot of strength into the human psyche and I pray my coworker will make it through this horrible time and end up stronger for the experience.
Thanks for listening.
